A first-hand account of the fallout from one drunken summer night in July 2005.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

The Inevitable

Well, nothing too interesting has happened since my last post... Brad has been staying at my house pretty much full-time, which has been great, even though Bitch is almost always with him. Mind you, we've had lots of chances to fool around when she's not there, and we have pretty much everywhere: the shower, my bed, his bed, all over the living room, well pretty much all over the whole goddamn house. I'd blog about some of those (because believe me, some of them are definitely blog-worthy) but the purpose of my post today is to say that the moment I've been dreading for months has finally come.

Brad is moving across the country next week.

He decides to tell me this as the two of us are driving home Monday night in freezing rain in my brand new car sans snow tires, so at first I got pissed off that he made me skid out and almost land the car in the ditch, but after I got control again I didn't really know what to say. Honestly I'd like to say I tried to convince him otherwise but I knew that this time he was serious. I barely said a word to him for the rest of the night. My mind was racing, I had tried to prepare myself for it, and I honestly thought I could convince him to wait until spring, when I'm planning on moving out, and even if he is going now, he wants to come back for Christmas (even though I can't see that happening) and worse case scenario we're talking like 2-3 months at most.


I've gotten pretty accustomed to spending pretty much every night with this guy over the past couple of months. Me, who less than 4 years ago was thisclose to asking my girlfriend, who I worshipped, to marry me. But she fucked around so I canned her ass. Then I thought I fell in love with Brad's sister, but boy was I wrong when she got knocked up by a drug dealer. Then out of nowhere, I fuck my best friend. Totally random, drunk sex with a guy I've been friends with since I was 10, and I go and fall in love with him. Then he tells me he loves me back. THEN he tells me he's moving to the other side of the country. Just as we start making some actual progress. And I know he's not moving to escape me, per se, the guy lost his job. The biggest industry here is falling to pieces and all the smaller businesses rely on that so that means there are no jobs here at all, basically. The West is the place to be and that's where I want to be too but just not right now. Christmas is coming and my whole family lives here, and I just can't go now. But man, it's hard to choose when you feel this strongly about someone and they leave.

I was looking forward to spending Christmas with Brad like I did last year. I have gifts for him already bought. I'll probably end up giving them to him before he leaves, or maybe not at all. I dunno yet. He knows that I'm pissed, and I usually spaz out on him which pisses him off, but this time I didn't. I gave him the semi-silent treatment for a couple hours and since then I've let on like it hasn't bothered me. It does, and he knows that too, but I guess on the other hand this might be good for me. Spend some time away from each other. Honestly I'm just saying that. I'll be miserable for awhile and want to see him all the time. For a guy that hates winter, this is really gonna make things even worse...

The upside is, I get to have goodbye sex with him. Goodbye sex is almost as good as breakup sex with a little angry sex mixed in. I'm definitely gonna make sure that he won't soon forget it. I think the handcuffs need to come back out of retirement for this...

Oh and trust me, I'll definitely blog about it.


Sunday, November 05, 2006

Three Magic Words

The past few weeks have been uneventful, all around. I've been busy with work, getting ready for winter, being pissed off that winter is coming, all that good stuff. Brad and Bitch have been staying at my house off and on, which has been good. I've been lonely since my roommates moved out, so even though Bitch has been with Brad almost every time, I wasn't really complaining. I was just kinda hoping that she might have something else to do some night and not be able to come with him.

Friday night, me, Brad and Cuz (Brad's cousin) went out to the bars. Some asshole that used to live next door to Brad was there, and he has a permanent chip on his shoulder towards Brad. For some reason they ended up out in the parking lot so me and Cuz bolted out the door to play backup. After a few minutes though, the situation was diffused and everyone went back inside.

Somewhere along the line somebody had some energy pills. I had heard of them; quite a few people had taken them but I've never tried them. Long story short, I took one and then found out about 45 minutes later that I was only supposed to take about a quarter of the pill. I was in for a long weekend...

After we dropped Cuz off, we headed back up towards my house. On the way, I told Brad what I had done, and he asked me what the pills looked like. I took the other one out of my pocket and when I held it up for him to look at, he grabbed it and threw it down his throat. I started laughing (because seriously, I was gonna be awake for the next40 hours or so, so I might as well have some company) and then I told him about NOT taking an entire pill. He just kinda looked at me and started laughing, and said "Ah well, whaddya do?"

After we got home, I went inside and build a fire, and for some reason Brad walked around to the passenger side of the car and was rummaging around for something in the dash. It was about 20 minutes later, I realized that he still hadn't come inside the house. I walked out into the kitchen and looked out the door. There was Brad, sound asleep in the car. I laughed and walked outside, opened the door of the car and said "Man, you gotta wake up, it's freezing out here!" Which of course, didn't work, so I picked up his wallet and cell phone off the floor of the car and grabbed his right arm and put it around my neck so I could stand him up. As I started to bend down to lift him up, he pulled me into his chest and mumbled something that sounded like "I love you" but figured that couldn't be it. I pulled back a little bit and said "What?" and when I looked up at him, his eyes were wide open. He pulled me back into him again and said "I love you". My head started spinning and my heart was racing. For a very cloudy minute, I thought maybe it was just a bad buzz but then I looked up at him and said "You do?" He just smiled and nodded, then climbed out of the car. I walked back inside, still in a daze, and sat down on the couch. Brad walked in and laid down beside me, and sometime while I was trying to think of what to say, we both fell asleep.

About an hour later, I awoke to Brad walking towards the bathroom. There was a porn movie playing on TV, and again, I felt completely puzzled. When Brad came back in, he asked what I was watching. I looked at the TV again and realized it was a gay porn. I must have looked like a dumbass just sitting there, looking from Brad, back to the TV, with this dumb look on my face. Then I remembered what he had said, and just as I was about to say something, Brad stood up and started taking off his pants. "Looks like they're having fun..."

I gave my head a shake and said "Yeah, I think we can do better." The next little while is a bit blurry; all I really remember is us tackling each other; clothes being ripped off and thrown, me grabbing his shoulders, wrestling each other down onto the couch, kissing licking touching everywhere, my nails running from his neck down his body, grabbing his ass, pushing his head back down onto the couch as I slid down his body and between his legs. I pushed his legs apart, resting them on my shoulders and took his entire steel-hard cock in my mouth. He let out a loud moan and I felt his huge hands on the back of my shaved head. His legs tightened around my back and I somehow found more room for his dick in my throat. The drugs had kicked in full-force by now and every sensation was heightened to the max. Brad's not usually a moaner but now he was like an animal. His dick was leaking like crazy and he tasted so fucking good I never wanted to stop sucking his cock. I heard him grab the TV remote and the porn started blasting over the surround sound. His legs still wrapped around my back, I reached up with both hands and grabbed his pecs, squeezing them, running my hands up and down his body, grabbing his shoulders, his neck, the sides of his head. He took my thumb in his mouth and sucked on it, biting it. We couldn't get enough to each other.

"You like my fuckin cock in your mouth?" He growled

"Mmm hmm" was my reply, "You like your fuckin cock in my mouth?" I asked back

"Fuck yes. I'm never taking this fuckin dick out of you"

I still had my head completely buried between his thighs, licking his balls on every downstroke. I grabbed his ass again and worked my way into his crack. I barely had one finger into the first knuckle and he gasped, saying "You gotta fuck me now. Fuck me now please. Hard."

I looked up at him, his dick still in my mouth and raised my eyebrows. "NOW" he growled.

"Lube's all gone" I told him, thinking of his low pain tolerance.

He sat bolt upright and grabbed me, pulling me closer. "Shove your cock in my mouth" he said. I pushed him down onto his back again and sat on his chest. He grabbed my dick and started licking the head. His tongue was in fast forward and in no time I was pumping my hips back and forth, holding his head while I fucked his mouth. I spit on my left hand and reached down between his legs. I worked one finger, then two, then three into his tight hole. My back was being clawed; moans were still escaping from Brad, I was getting hotter and hornier by the second. I dropped my head back and looked back down to him. "Now. Let's go." I pulled out and climbed off of him. I jumped down between his legs and threw them up on my shoulders again. I positioned my cockhead at his hole and pushed. He exhaled deeply and said "fuckin hurts. keep fuckin goin" I tried to be easy with him but the combination of the drugs and the sight of him laying on his back, on my couch, with his legs on my shoulders, sweating and panting like a marathon runner wasn't doing much for my self control. I grit my teeth and said "bite something and breathe baby" and I shoved into him. This look of pure pain washed over his face for a second, but when I gyrated my hips just a little bit his eyes rolled back and he went "oooohhhhhhhh yeahhh" so I held still for a little bit to let him get somewhat used to me, and then I grabbed his thighs and started to pump in and out of him. Again we both turned into wild men. He arched his back and grabbed me wherever he could, I was holding myself up over him, his legs around my back, slamming into his ass; my hands on his chest holding myself up.

We were both drenched in sweat and he was biting his bottom lip; in between gasps he reached over quickly to the coffee table and grabbed a bottle of water and took a quick drink from it. As he went to set it back on the table I grabbed it from his hand and started dumping it over my head and down onto him. His eyes were closed and he had that trademark sexy grin on his face.

"You just soaked your couch" he said

"I don't fucking care. I'm fucking you." And I didn't really care either; the couch was already soaked in sweat and a fair amount of lube, water couldn't do anything but good. And, I was fucking Brad. Not much interrupts Brad time.

Honestly, it may seem I'm just getting lazy in writing this, but I can't remember every detail. At one point Brad looked at the clock and said it was 10:30 a.m., we'd been on the go since about 5, I was still power-fucking him. Whatever was in the drugs we took they were doing wonders for staying power. The porn was still playing on TV, the living room was trashed, the smell of sex was unbelievable, our lips were chapped from kissing each other, all over, my bottom lip was cut from jamming it into his teeth too hard, I had claw marks all up my back and my head was spinning. We were in every position possible, the couch wasn't the most comfortable place to have marathon sex but we didn't care. Everything was just so blurry...

Then all of a sudden everything cleared. Brad wrapped his hands around my neck and started breathing harder. His body started jerking and his ass tightened up. He buried his head in the crook of my neck and said "I'm cumming" over and over until I felt the hot splash all over my chest and stomach. I reached between us and squeezed his dick and pumped all the cum out of it. His ass got tighter and tighter and I knew I wouldn't last much longer. Brad was biting hard into my right shoulder and digging his nails into my neck and I wrapped my arms around his torso and jammed him back down onto my cock. I picked him up 3, maybe 4 times and it felt like my entire dick literally exploded inside him. With all my strength I threw him onto his back, me still hooked to him in our embrace and jammed it home one last time. My orgasm felt like it lasted for an hour at least. My head was spinning so bad I thought I was going to pass out.

I could feel Brad's hands running up and down my back, massaging my asscheeks, his lips on my shoulder and neck, my head buried between his and the back of the couch; panting and sweating, incredibly dizzy, my nails still dug into the sides of his ass and his legs still wrapped around my body. I have no idea how long we laid there; when I picked my head up I looked at the clock, 12:38 p.m.

I started to laugh. Brad asked what, smiling, I said "I couldn't think of any better way to spend 8 hours" he just laughed in agreement and I pulled myself off of him. We just sat there for the longest time, catching our breaths, still absently touching each other. It was about 1:30 when Brad finally stood and asked if I'd be joining him in the shower. I said yes and in we went.

As I was washing the soap off of my head, Brad said "I meant it, you know." and I kinda looked at him. "What I said when you got me out of the car, I meant it." I clued in about the whole "I-Love-You" thing and I nodded, smiling. "I love you too" I said and finished rinsing the soap.

"We still have to be careful and just take things one step at a time, and I'm not leaving Bitch... yet... but I was just thinking of when you told me the same thing and how bad I felt about not saying it back even though I wanted to. Know what I mean?" He asked.

"Yeah I do. I know we're not just gonna throw in the towel and leave everything behind, jump in the car and fuck off. Sometimes I wish we could but I know we can't. So yeah, I'm really happy you said it. Finally!" I grinned.

"Good. I'm glad I make you happy. You make me happy too. Actually, you're about the only person that's not on my case all the time. Well, really you ARE the only person who's not on my case. I don't know how you put up with me, I know I can be quite a handful sometimes."

"Yeah you are, but I'm ambitious. I like having something to look out for. You keep me busy but believe me Brad, it's all worth it. You'll never know how much you really mean to me. Seriously." I told him

"Someday I will. Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere" He said quietly and then gave me a kiss on the lips.

We finished our shower and went about our usual Saturday, the drugs still keeping us awake. By 11:00 Saturday night, we were both completely zapped. He slept at his house and I passed out on my living room floor in front of the fireplace. I slept there until 10:00 Sunday morning, and when I woke up and looked at my potentially ruined couch, I felt different. I knew I wasn't waiting for something anymore. He'd finally said it.